Saturday, September 11, 2010


Sooo been trying to adjust to the west coast. I love it and have blogged a long explanation of my time off and what's been going on. It's still under construction as it's kind of lengthy. I have trying to keep up with everyone, though it's a bit difficult. Birthday next week. Who wants to go to Vegas?!

Friday, May 14, 2010

Vacation Over

Well, in my last post I said that my next post would be coming from Manhattan Beach. I came and left and had a great time in between. That was about four weeks ago; and yet this post is from California nonetheless. That is because I am now a resident of the state. Yeah, you read that correct. I loved the place so much that I moved I went back to my old life for a few weeks, wrapped my time there up and moved to Los Angeles.

At first, while I was toying with the idea of moving out west all the logistics of such a move seemed like a staggering task and though it was, I somehow managed it. Please excuse my momentary self satisfaction. I must admit to feeling quite accomplished for having pulled this off. The whole thing happened so quickly it was like I had never even left to go back and gather up my life in the first place.

I am at the moment being forced to help a relative [living on the other side of the country] with a presentation, so I'll have to explain exactly HOW a vacation, turned into a complete rearranging of my life a but later. Love reading what's been happening with you all.

Monday, April 12, 2010

LA LA Land

Ok. My computer broke (again), my boss/mentor quit, I got a flaming ass replacement boss, missed out on a new job opportunity, declined a promotion, and have been asked several times by my mother to move back home. But none of that matters right now because in 24 hours; this time tomorrow, I will be stepping off a jet at LAX and will inhale a lungful of California air. My Spring Break is a bit late but deserved IMHO.

In a list of necessary evils flying is very highly ranked for me. It bothers me more than I will admit to anyone. I drove to California seven years ago and will not attempt to do such again, so a plane is an essential discomfort that I will endure to get out West. I'll most likely be on my iPod touch d-_-b the entire flight.

Hopefully I'll be able to update with pics and such while I'm there. But there's no telling. I'm staying in a beach house for a week, with a Range Rover and Mercedes at my disposal. :-) and I get to see my little cousins whom I adore. My boss will coincidentally be there as well, so maybe I'll see him too before I return to Ga. So far it seems to be a promising trip. I get a whole week on the pacific. I wish I were in beach shape, but won't sweat it too much. I only go every three or four years, so I'll just enjoy the vacation. I have to get some sand too. I collect it from all the beaches I visit. I have a few bottles from different places in the US. So hopefully the next update I make will be from Manhattan Beach, California.

Monday, January 25, 2010

What Do I Say If They Ask If I'm Gay?!

Just re-read my "What's with All The Sudden Interest" post, and realized that I got some comments that I kind of left hanging in mid-air. So, I feel like a bit of a fool for not saying thank you to naturgesetez, goleftatthefork, A. Friend, Aron2631, AEK, and Bruce. My computer, job and housing situation all changed around those weeks, so I had been thrown off posting and hadn't really recovered since. Thank you for your kinds words and encouragement. If you all have posted and received comments on your respective blogs, I'm sure you know the feeling it brings when someone takes the time to read what you wrote and respond. I find myself a more confident adult in 2010. There is something that troubles me. Wanting very badly to be in a relationship has me edging toward becoming more open about my sexuality. My family is the real tricky part here. 6 months ago my mother asked me about marriage and my thoughts on children. At the time I panicked and thought she was fishing for answers. Answers to questions that made me think..."what do I say if they ask if I'm gay?" [I love how this rhymes! It was intentional.]

What I am going to say is simply the way that I am evaluating my current situation with my family by highlighting points made by those who commented and things from the conversation between my mother and myself. Please, please feel free to comment on, suggest, challenge, point out, add to, or discuss anything that follows.

@ naturgesetz: I can't tell them I like guys. There are so many reasons why I can't do it that it isn't even funny. I honestly haven't decided whether I'm marrying a woman or deciding to choose a man. In fact, I think it would be best to do some dating before I make any decision to talk to them about this. It could be that I choose to have a traditional family and kids. It is horrific to contemplate explaining to my family that I've had a change of heart and am getting married to a woman after telling them I like boys. Plus I feel like I just hit my stride with my parents. We've never had a strong relationship and now that I finally am getting somewhere, adding something like this to the equation has too great of a magnitude to measure. To me the consequences are too far reaching and potentially negative to measure.

@ goleftatthefork: My parents are very speculative people, which compounds the fact that I don't share anything about myself. I was a very private child. I was a private teenage; and six years after graduating and moving our I haven't changed much. My parents have no idea about what's going on in my life at any given time. Again, I'm not a parent so my lack of knowledge of how their brains work really hurts me here, but I know my parents talk about stuff like this. Their motivations and conclusions about the topic is really what concerns me. Do I think they know... no. Have they at some point had this conversation... probably yes.

@ A.Friend: Haha. My younger brother would be OK if I said that I loved a tree. He would think me a bit weird if I did, but we wouldn't change much except for the fact that he would probably have something extra to tease me about [which is what we do to each other]. My oldest sister would want to talk about it and try to be understanding and make herself very available. It's my older brother and my sister [the bloody gay one] close to me that I'm unsure about.

@ aron: I actually thought you were spot on. I figured my sister has the strongest suspicion. Being gay, I guess she can spot the 'signs' if there are any that I've missed [gotta ask Jake if I exhibit any signs, now that I think about it]. LoL. I'm brave. I'll face the fear for now.

Aek: Whew. Thank God, my father hasn't asked me anything. He has no shame with questions. He will just straight up ask anything that occurs to him. Which is part of the reason I think he doesn't know. Either it hasn't occurred to him or he is afraid of the answer.

@ Bruce: The closest is very comfortable right now. LOL! I think I prejudiced the post about conversation between my mom and me with my paranoia. I think I made it seem as though she was reaching out for me. Now, months later it seems as though she was just interested in general about me. I mean I am very much a mystery to my parents. Outside of music, basketball, and my favorite color they know very little about me.

@ DBC: I have and will continue to think on what you've shared. Thanks!

There is nothing about my immediate demeanor or actions that would suggest that I am homosexual or [as I am in reality] bisexual. There is simply no evidence. How would they know? :( For those that think they do know, please tell me what are some determining factors in discerning how to spot someone who is gay.