Saturday, January 17, 2009

I loved that F!&@ing Shirt

Where do I begin...

I've mentioned before that I wanted to go to a gay club, just to feel the vibe and also to get the curiosity out my system. Well, my friend David, a friend of his and I went last night. We chose the newest one in town, which neither of the two of them had ever been to. We got great parking and ended up right in front of the club, so we decided to do a little stake out and see what was up before entering. We ended up sitting outside for 20 mintues! Finally I went in to check it out for them so we could see if it was jumping or not. I walked into the door and there was this very short lady security guard who asked me for i.d. I politely told her that I was just checking the atmosphere out and had two friends that were waiting for me outside. I scoped out the scene: Bar: too small; number of ppl: deep as hell; and a throng of them gathered around a drag queen dancing to a song I didn't know.

So, I went back to the car and told them [in succinctly accurate detail] what was inside. David and I got out of his car and went to his friend Curtis' car but Curtis decided that he didn't want to get out. He wanted to go home instead. I had never met him, but I needed as much veteran support as possible on my first excursion. So, after some very deft coercion he agreed. As he gets out of his car, David turns to me and says, "You're good". I wanted to agree, but it wouldn't have been modest ;) As we approached the door I asked a young lady outside what it was like in the club. Though I had been inside, I had only seen unattractive ppl on the outside when we first parked. She said that it was jumping, but didn't know if it was my type of scene. I [because I love playing dumb] asked her what kind of scene was it. She told me that it was a gay club and that most straight guys probably couldn't handle it. I assured that I was looking for a good time, and if this club was popping then I would be ok. I was both intrigued and amused that she had assumed that I was straight.

So, we stroll into the club, immediately hit the bar and go up to a loft area in the back. We chill for a bit as we watch the Drag Queen show and as David and I point out who we each think is hot and those who should have not been allowed admittance. I must say that apparently, hotties only come out after 12 because after a bit we began seeing quite a few guys that I had to admit were really good looking. I also saw a guy that shops at my store periodically. I thought that he was a cutie when I saw him while I was work and it was a plus that he was in this club tonite. It struck me that he reminds me of Damian from MTV's TRL. In fact he looks very much like Damian but he was only one of sea of many fine mofos walking around at this point. I also must take this time to mention that there were several shirtless hotties walking around as this will be important to the story later on. There was this guy representing Gold's Gym. He kept walking past me. I thought he was trying to torture me with his banging body, like he was the ghost of homosexual-past or something!

After a corona I was ready to dance, which was convenient cause David had to pee [the first of 3 trips to the bathroom for him] and the bathrooms were downstairs. After doing his business we headed out to the dance floor. I'm not too familiar with homosexual culture, but apparently the DJ was spinning some ppl's favorite joints cause the dance space was full. I like when ppl actually dance at a club. It means they are trying to have a good time. I got a spot close to the mirror and started trying to create Stomp The Yard 2. While dancing, simply minding my own business, I look up and see this girl I work with. I almost went into evasive action and prepared myself to duck out the back of the club, but I was having a good time and wasn't going to let her mess it up. There were several straight guys at this club, and I had only danced with a girl so far. We didn't acknowledge each other, but there was a point where we looked DIRECTLY into each other's faces. I thought I was going to die. I somehow managed to survive though.

I continued to dance for a while thinking surely David and Curtis will join me in a little bit and the three of us would be silly and dance around. Nope. I was on the floor alone as they watched from the sidelines. A "slower" song began to play and I started seeing folks grinding on each other, so I fled the dance floor and I re-joined the guys and we kinda bounced around to the side. That was at least until some girl eyed me and beckoned me to come dance with her. I accepted and we danced. She kept rubbing against my stuff. I was sooo sure that she was trying to get me hard. I mean girl was pulling out all her tightest moves and but there was no reponse from downstairs. Nothing. I wasn't aroused not one bit. The song went off, we hugged and parted. I went back over to my friends and we danced and laughed. I felt the night was winding down and was content with my club experience. I had gone out and seen a myriad of spectacles and I had laughed and had a great time.

Then I saw him. I had seen shirtless guys walking around all night. I wanted to touch some, but I didn't. I could only imagine the freaky crap that I would do to them. Well as I was dancing, minding my own business, I was approached by a cute guy. He was white, 5'9, a buck-60, slim build. He had a drink and came close to where my friends and I were standing. He danced next to me for a moment and we danced together. I had never dance with a guy up until that point. He was off beat sorta, so I sat him down and gave him...a lap dance. He was pleased and then we started grinding on each other. I think I lost all sense that there were other ppl in the club. I was thinking to myself that this guy is just teasing me. I saw him on the dance floor earlier dancing with some guy. It was clear that the dude wanted to fondle him, but 'shirtless' wasn't with it. He strictly wanted to dance. So, imagine my surprise when he takes my hand and rubs it up and down his body. It felt too good. We dance close almost rubbing noses, then BAM!! He kisses me. Tongue, lips, saliva all melt into one as I make-out with this guy in the middle of the club. I could not believe it. So continue dancing and kissing, then he to put his hands down my pants. I had on three shirts to that was difficult to accomplish, so I helped him out a little bit. So damnit I slide my hands down his pants. I fish around a little bit. We break apart, gather fresh air into our lungs and we go back to dancing mildy. At this point my heart is racing. David grabs my arm and says, "have you done this before?" I shake my head and yell no over the music. I had no idea what I was doing...I mean I had some idea, but I am not familiar with gay hook-up protocol.

The guy and I get back to our courtship, then like some slut I ask him to come to the bathroom with me. He agrees and we go back there, but a HUGE security guard is watching the back door, which is open as ppl had ventured out there to seal their own sexual deals. It's only my luck that the damn bathroom and back door are so close. I let him go in first, afraid that the guard would bust us if he suspected something. I did follow after him quickly. We had a little fun in the stall [which had no door] and then I watched him take a piss. I slunk out of the bathroom because five ppl walked in at that moment. Back in the club proper we plotted out departure. I suggested that we go somewhere. He said that he would go anywhere if I named a place. So, I said, "what about my apartment?" He agreed to go with me once we find his shirt. We looked around for a bit, but no luck. So I told him that I would give him mine.

I took the topmost of my shirts off and told him to put it on. He did and I led him and David out of the club. Curtis had already made his way out and was in his car [parked next to us]. David realized that I was planning on taking this guy home, and was a little upset that I hadn't introduced them. The truth was that I didn't even know the guy's name. He gave it up [the name] easily and shook David's hand. David asked me what I wanted to do, and I told him that Benjamin [for that was the name he gave us] and I wanted to go back to my place. David suggested that he wanted to be a part of the action, but Ben declined. He said that he wasn't into threesomes. I don't think I was up for a threesome either, I mean it was slutty enough to bring someone home from the club after three dances and not even knowing their name. Ben's refusal seem to hurt David's feelings. So, being the kind, sensitive, knowing friend that I am; I told Ben that tonite wasn't going to work out. I told him that I had fun and if he wanted to exchange numbers maybe we could call each other. He was upset at my snub. I was tempted to ask for my shirt back, but I let him keep it. He couldn't find his and I felt bad for leading him out of the club only to send him back like some fish that didn't quite meet my expectations.

David and I positively had it out for the next hour. I was very upset with him. I can't say with certainty what emotion made him mad at me, but the fact that he was angry with me completely pissed me off. I rarely get angry. I read once that anger was a weak emotion and was often the cause of that which we come to regret most dearly. So, I tried to be in control, but I was seething. We got back to my apartment and we continued our fight. Part of me wants to go and apologize to the rest of the building, lest they heard us yelling at 4am.

This whole thing really surprised me, because I felt like he was making me the bad guy. So, I brought up how selfish he was being. Had I not turned down my first guy to instead go back home with him? Did I not just seemingly lead this guy on only to deny him at the last minute because the friendship between David and I was more important than some random dick at a club? On a night that I was to have my first experience, I gave it up because my good friend had left empty-handed. I cited these things as he grew emotional. It only made me more upset. How could he cry? Why did he constantly have to make this about him? Flashback 2006: David threw me a 20th birthday party. I am constantly uptight, and often branded as the responsible one cause I only take VERY calculated risks. That party was my night to get wild and silly. David got drunk and completely stole the show. He went on a very well remembered rant. The next day he apologized and threw me a second [make-up] party the following week. Do I have to tell you guys that he did the same thing again?! I actually wasn't even mad. I grew up as the middle child, and I don't terribly care for the spotlight so it didn't pain me. I know that that kind of thing is just in his nature. Now here we were in present time on a night that was again supposed to be about me and my going to my first gay club and experiencing all these things which were so foreign to me...and David strikes again. He actually pointed out that this was the first time in all our arguments, and we had argued frequently, that I was actually angry with him. I told him that he can mark it down as the one night that I was really upset. The one time I decided to throw caution into the wind and do something irresponsible.

Well, we reconcile, and I offer to take him home and just crash at his house because he had to be to work at 9am. I really wanted to stay home and sleep in my bed but I had no problem with the offered arrangement. David and his two roommates and I used to live together for two year. We know each other very well. I took him to his place and he asked me to show him my dick again. I was exasperated. My dick couldn't take any more teasing for the night. I gave him the same answer as before. He decided that he wasn't sleepy yet and therefore I couldn't sleep either, so we ended up playing and laughing for the rest of the night while he pretended to come on to me, while I spurned his advances. Admittedly there have been nights, when restless I decided to amuse my self by keeping him up, so I can't say I didn't deserve it. Finally around 6:45 he went to bed and I fell on the sectional in the living room. I had slept on it before because we had it when we lived together, and the damn thing is so comfy that it's easy to crash on. I woke up and one of my other ex-roommates and I watched an episode of House and then he took me home. I proceeded to rush to my computer to type this ridiculously long account of my first gay night out. If you've made it this far...damn. Thank you for reading. You now know all about my first real [sober] experience with a guy. A part of me is glad that I didn't have some random hook-up, but my dick is still mad at me for turning down much needed sex. What's wrong with me? My f*!@ing fingers hurt now. Holla!


TNC said...

Ah, the first time at a gay club. Congrats on taking that step (and almost hooking up). That would have been a great story.

There will be more opportunities, so don't despair.

Razz said...

aaarrggh! you're too nice! although, that must have been some boost for your ego. you deserve it. did you use your secret weapon smile? :) when my mates and i go out, there's an unwritten rule that we don't get in the way of any hook-ups. ffs, that's why we go out most of the time! anyway, overall, it sounded like a positive experience for you. cheers.


Mr. HCI said...

Sounds like quite a night out.

I can't stress enough, though, how important I think it is for the first experience to be with someone you know and for whom you have feelings, rather than a hookup from a bar (or elsewhere).

I've said this on other blogs but it's always worth repeating:

Sex without love is just getting your rocks off.
Sex with love is magic and something to be treasured.

DieseljockNYC said...

Lmao, amazing entry. Great story. I love it.

Ya know, I'm 50/50 on the whole "first" thing. One can either spend forever waiting for that "special" guy to give it up to or you can choose any hot guy who's clean and attractive and is of your liking. I don't think there's wrong with either. I think its more of a personal preference thing. I've always lived by the idea of making sure I make decisions based out of an equal balance of logic and emotion (mental and emotional). Maybe that could work for you.

I think your story is majorly hot. As far as your friend is concerned, hmm, I can relate. I can tell you and I would be awesome friends if we know each other.

Look forward to reading more.

Aek said...

You know, I probably would've done the same thing you did (albeit, for slightly different reasons perhaps). My dick would've been equally mad at me the next day. :P But it sounded like your first gay club experience was a pretty good one nonetheless (the actual clubbing part)!

Btw, this post wasn't that long, lol. At the very least, it didn't read long.

Rapha said...

I always put my friends first, athough they keep proving me that I'm wrong about it...

If you took your shit back, would you use it again?? I probably wouldnt...

Nice story!


E said...

TNC- Thank you. It was a memorable experience. Never seen drag before.

Razz- C'mon now! You know I used the smile. He wouldn't have given me the time of day [or night] otherwise.

HCI- It dawned on me when I realized that I hadn't even got dude's name and was ready to take him home that I was moving way too fast. I stick by my post about waiting for a good guy and not some hook-up....for now J/K!

DJNYC- A large part of me just wants to get it over with, but I can't help but think that it is a bit trampy to go out and just hook-up. I guess next time if I'm sure the guy is decent, and we actually have a conversation, and he can find his clothes, and I know his name before I invite him to my apartment, THEN I'll go all the way.

AEK- I don't think I could forget that night if I wanted. What would have been your reasons?

Rapha- David is a good guy. He is just a bit difficult at times. But he is worth having as a friend; trust me when I say we wouldn't hang out if he wasn't.

Aek said...

I don't know, I think it'd be very difficult for me to just grab a guy at a club and have a one night stand or something. I'm also a wee bit paranoid about some things, knowing some of the things I do. o.O

Also, I just probably wouldn't feel comfortable nor confident enough to do something like that.

Diary of a Mad Latino Man said...

I remember my first time and let me tell you, I will never forget it. It was with this straight football player that I went to school with. He fucked the shit out of me and then after that I became his random booty call that is until Holden and I became an item. Once Holden and I started dating I had to give him up. I know what I fuck head I was doing that thinking Holden was my man I should worship the groud he walked on.

Just wait because I always remember my first time. Even though I didn't know nothing that you had to lube the condumn and that football player ripped me so bad I was walking around like a loose goose.